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Regiment: 1st U.S. Volunteers Sharpshooters
Battles Mentioned:
Historical Figures:
Camp near Stonemans Station Va.
Army of the Potomac Feby. 19th 1863
My Mary
I dont know as
I ought to write to night in answer to yours of
the 9
th inst. – which owing to being on Picket for the
last four days. I have but just received for fear
I may say what I ought not. Bear in mind
thought, through all no matter what I may
write. that my love for you is just as deep
as fond and true as it was and has been for
the last eighteen months. But Mary my
heart is heavy to-night and
for you. Every
art by which mankind can gain wealth or fame,
has been practiced upon the human race ever since
they had a being. To enumerate all the various
modes by which the
same end is accomplished
would take more time and paper than I have
to call my own. at present. One will suffice
for this time. that one is
Christianity. Take
it in all its varied forms. and its name is legion
and you will not find any thing that will
compete with it in popularity with the masses
To make you despise its very name and prac
tices as I do. you would only want to be an in-
mate for a few days. Of some of our many hospital
the entire North have united in sending delicacies to
our sick and wounded. they are sent to our Regts.
it is only of those I can speak personally. They
generly generally came through the Chaplain. he
selects whatever he thinks palatable for his own use
and to treat his friends with. If there is any
left and very often there is not the sick get it.
True Christianity shows itself by its works
and it is not a benefit under whatever guise
it may come unless it beings to some heart a
kindness. I fit brings that kindness why does
it need a name. why
[ ? ] it on lips of praise
through the land. Many a talented mind
is engaged in every branch of which mans
mind is capable of conceiving. The English
Language is
[ ? ]. it gives the intellect an agent
by which no matter what the subject it
can make an appeal to that other intellect to
which it is speaking. If that other intellect
is off its guard it will in the enthusiasm of the
moment enclose what in its own calmer seasons
it knows to be false. You with all you
faith in God. do not believe he will help you
by your prayers alone. You know you must
take hold with a will yourself or your prayers
are useless. Ask yourself Dear Mary if the same
amount of energy without the prayer would not
have accomplished the same result. “A Heaven
hereafter.” it is an absurdity. There cannot be
such a place. Do you realize any former state
of existence. Certainly not. And yet you know
from your very formation that you have existed
in other forms for centuries. Why should we
Judge of the future only by the past and present.
You see daily, Springing into existence all
around you. new forms of
[ ? ] life. you know
that very many of
that life those lives contribute
to your own being. All History tells the
same identical truths of the past. Have not
those other forms of existence had a language
quite as expressive as ours and told as
[ ? ]
many things we know nothing of now. How can
we tell. It is undeniable that all things have
a language.
Mary I do not believe you was in your right and I
believe if you had taken the sober second thought or you would not
have joined any church. They are the bane of society the Curse of
the world. They are simply organized for power to control the
destinies of our race is thus sole purpose. Offer any of its
Apostles a life long competency in a useful
[ ? ] and offers him
a few hundreds more no matter what its position which will he
take. The riches every time for well he knows “Wealth governs
the world,” Mary if you had lived with me a life time
you would never have felt the wish in your heart to take
the step you have taken. You are lonesome very lonesome
If I were there I should try to argue you out of your
present mind but I dont know as I had better
[ ? ]
more about it. If you are happier than before it will
only make you feel bad and nothing is farther from my
wishes than that. As much as it would please you to have
me commence a praying life. I can never do it. I try my best
to doing duty to do no
[ ? ] to my fellow man. that is as far as
I shall ever go. I love you always
A kiss Gardner
[On Envelope:]
Miss Mary Baxter
Grand Rapids
(Box 450) Michigan
